Sunday, July 8, 2012

A Decade


Ten years ago, a fifteen year old girl fell in love...with a city. 
It's been one wild love affair. 
CA, I'm yours. 

Well, all my recent life decisions have led to me (once again)
 leaving Los Angeles, at least for a stint. 
What pangs me most in leaving is my little home 
 "the cabin" 
It's truly the best place I've ever lived. 
And now, I must vacate in two weeks.
I look around and think
" What are you doing? You're crazy for leaving this place. You'll never find another place like it!
Don't uproot again. Why are you sabotaging your life again?"
(I can beat myself up to a pulp)
No matter how charming and comfortable I am in my little home,
I must look internally.... 
for that is what needs to be admired, cared for,
 and nurtured.

Anywho, there's no turning back. 
Plans have been set in motion. 
I've dug my own grave.
Or rather, to change my language...
I'm slowly building my wings!
Yes, that one feels better! 

There will always be fear to pummel, 
doubts to crush, 
and insecurities to ignore. 

But now, it's time for me to have some further adventures...away from LA.
To Bloom upward and onward.

Even though I'm shedding a few salty tears while packing a bag full of fears and regrets; 
It's Time to Let Go of my security blanket. 
I'll learn to cope without it. 
Still a Seed,
-Lu

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